Something by starting a family so young, and throwing myself into mommyhood at such a young age is I missed out on the college years. I was completely happy with where I was...I was where I wanted to be! But by doing so, I did miss all of the stage of dating and going out, clubs, and dancing doing that sort of thing.
In some ways I was relieved. I am very happy in jeans, barefoot in nature being creative. Having babies and baking and reading and searching for my own fun was fine by me, and anyways I felt shy about even GOING out to somewhere like that. I sighed relief knowing it was not for me, but yet a part of me looked out of the corner of my eye like it could be fun.
My brother married someone with a completely different outlook.
She had my niece at 15, but that didn't stop her from having fun. After my brother and her married and they became a family, she would invite me to "go out" with her. This would terrify me to the core.
1. Because I KNOW the places they go to. lol
2. Because I would feel So out of place and embarrassed and not know what to do with myself at such places.
3. Because white girls can't dance. (at least me)
They would come home with thier war stories of how much fun they had, and how late they stayed out and who did what, and I would feel RELIEF. Buuuttt. It also sounded a little fun.
It has been almost 20 years now.
Of her asking.
I kid you not.
Yet, my loving SIL STILL asks me, even though I always tell her no.
Her daughter has now grown up and joined the group. "Please Aunt Becky...come with us"
This week is her 4oth birthday.
Blame it on midlife crisis. Blame it on breaking it out of the box. Blame it on my bucket list. Blame it on my tattoo on my arm I try to live by now....
I told her I'm in.
If she protectsmeandshowsmehowtodance.
My friend laughed at me, and told me I could always go out there and zumba! HA!
Omg. At least I will have my posse of family to have my back.
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