Never Made It to the Butterfly Show

I ventured out today with just Matt and Summer. Our goal was the butterfly exhibit at the Conservatory in Downtown Cincinnati. What occurred was anything but a butterfly exhibit. But it was so much more. :)

As we drove we relied on our navigator to lead us out of our small country town and in to another world it seemed. Passed highways, and busy roads, as Summer fell asleep, Matt and I talked like we rarely do and saw what we rarely saw. Graffiti, and rundown buildings. Parts of the city that are known for danger. Sadness and fear. We locked our doors and drove past.

When we got close to Eden Park our destination, a very beautiful part of Cincinnati, we saw lines of cars and longs lines of people. We could hardly believe they were there for the butterfly show too? We couldn't even park there so we drove on and parked about a 1/2 mile away. This was the best gift. And this is where our adventure continued...
Eden Park is filled with beautiful things. Wonderful stone bridges, and fountains, and ponds. As we climbed out the car the kids ran right to this huge 2 story wall of stone. They climbed and could see the city! They could see the Ohio river and the bridge to KY. They could see the skyline. They were explorers and loved it.

Matthew in his "thinker" pose.

We continued on to the exhibit, but as we did we would find pockets of neat.

bridges
paths
abandoned buildings

fountains tucked away in the trees

When we got to the Conservatory, they told us the Butterfly exhibit LINE would take over and HOUR. But the flower Conservatory itself is FREE to go through. So that is what we did. I can remember my parents taking us here when I was little... The foggy pictures are due the extreme humidity and my lens fogging up.
This was a little cave that the kids would run through that I told Summer a monster lived in. (the same thing I was told by my brother as a kid) She felt so brave running through!


A little bit of Independence goes a long way...



So when we came out Summer wanted to touch the steel butterfly across the street on the hill. Matthew was like' Heck no!" But I said, for goodness sake....we came her to touch a butterfly...I'm as heck going to let her at least touch this one...So me and her crossed traffic and did just that!




We stopped at the actual Park of Eden park and saw the swollen Ohio River...

and a duck dive for fish!

and got some culture under our belts while we were there too!




Who knows where the day will lead you...but if you let it...it can really take you somewhere wonderful!

Happy Birthday Baby

Mike turned 47 yesterday. We had the afternoon alone (mom held down the fort) and went out to eat and to the movies...and after a cookout and cake, I got to go see him play! It was a great day.

Happy Birthday Babe <3

Track Meet / New Camera Lens

Today Jake had a home meet, and it was the perfect opportunity for me to try out my new lens that I have had FOREVER, but been afraid to try. It lets you take pictures from farther away, and makes the pictures look much closer and clearer. I am learning and working on it still! This is him in the relay race. He started their team out. He did so good! He gave them a great head start and they finished 2nd!
There he is passing the baton.

So while we waited for his races, I had time to practice some with my lens. LOL, can you guess what I practiced on? Say, someone with catsup and mustard on their face, mud on their knees, hair in disarray, Dora Underwear exposed, and hot pink Crocs, pretending to be a lion in a field.


You can't tell from the pictures, but I was quite far away from her, so she didn't know I was taking her picture :) I'm still working on the focus. Too cute that one is!

Tatum

When I was a teenager, my main goals of the week was to get through my day at vocational school. Keep my gas tank filled. Not run out of cigarettes. Secure plans with friends for the weekend.

Yes, I was more responsible than you are imagining ... I held a job and was very independant, and yes I was more reckless than you know, I was at a horrible run free age that took me many many places.

I think of this often now that I have a daughter the same age. Because I always knew I would be the cool mom and the one that could "relate". But our weeks are NOT the same. She is not at all like I was.

Sure she tries to keep her gas tank filled. And she holds a job, and her week is filled with friends. But I have never met a kid so grounded. I thought for sure, Karma was going to kick my ass on this one. I think my mother prayed for it.

(don't worry mom...there are 3 kids behind her)

She is awesome in many ways. Not only back then. When she made that 17 year old have to grow up and become a fantastic responsible mom. Slowly. Learning the hard ways sometimes. But now, she has chosen her own way, not the way I ever would of dreamed.

This is her report card. Junior Year. Third Quarter.

Physiology......A

Peopel.........A

American Literature.......A

Advanced Drawing...........A

Honors Pre-Calculus.........B

Problems of Democracy.........A

College Readiness...........A

I am bursting/beaming/ goofy with pride. Aww. Shucks. That's my girl :)

Life

Juggling. Busy. Happy. Full.

Summer cracked one of our 5 foot tall windows the other day waving {{pounding}} hello to a bird. We are all waiting with baited breath for it to shatter because you can actually hear little cracks occasionally. Our insurance company actually covers it due to her age! (minus the deduct able-blah ) One week for the glass to come in!

Windows open, fresh air in, weeping cherry in full bloom right outside my window.

Jake is in track and busy and happy with that. He had his first meet today. He is learning how to pole vault. He is getting huge muscles. It is amazing to watch his body transform into a mans. I don't remember with Tatum being this dumbstruck with this transformation they go through in puberty. He eats so much, and is growing so big. His feet are bigger than mine, he is getting taller by the day, his voice is getting deeper. My little guy is turning into his own guy...

Spring Cleaning, working on getting organized, working on my priorities...

I sent in my registration for the photography class. I did it. Money and registration. They confirmed I got one of the final spots. It starts at the end of the month. I feel like this will be the whole new beginning to a phase of me. I am open and ready and excited!

Dreaming, wondering, wishing, hoping, planning, plotting...

Tatum is getting her dress altered for the prom...it is ready to be picked up. Easter is around the corner, and so is Mike's 47th birthday! Registration for preschool, Matthew started soccer, Summer has been learning how to ride her big girl bike,I've been planning vacation for summer, ....OH, and a little life consuming thing called LAUNDRY.

"Life is a journey, not a destination."
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

Battle the Beast

This has to come out. And now it is coming to a head I feel. . . There are many outlets for all of us, and the blog for me has been awesome because I am a person that needs to write. Like, I NEED to write. At times I have something that needs to be put down to straighten it all out in my head or clear up. To document or be said, or even just to validate to myself. The blog has been great because at times it helped feed this "need" in me that I have. As we speak I reference to my notes that are scribbled on the back of a receipt from my purse. Words hit me while I was out with the kids today and I hastily wrote them on the only scrap paper I could find, so my profound words wouldn't be lost before I had the chance to really sit down and type. If you were to investigate my life you would find these little notes all around me. In my pockets and glove box, tucked in drawers. Ideas and thoughts. Notebooks and packets..... . . So the blog was great because it tapped into this area of writing that I can use. Alot of stuff doesn't get published. Alot of stuff does. Anyways, it really was great, because it helped my not only document our lives, BUT I got to use alot of pictures. I love the pictures. My blog has always been filled with pictures. Which is where I guess this all leading to.... . . As you all know I have been an at home mom for 18 years. Eighteen years is a long time. I love my kids fiercely, wouldn't change a thing, and KNOW that this what I wanted more than anything in my life. I am though, tired. And worn out. And wanting. And scared. . . . I am ready to start to move. Not just the dream part any more, but move. Towards something. And it is terrifying. I am ready to start to pursue my education in photography. Just a 10 week course to start off with. Just filling out the paperwork has given me heart palpitations. . . . It is so small a move, alot of you would laugh. But to someone who has never lived independently, or worked, or known different, it is terrifying. I think the biggest thing I am afraid of to tell the truth is defeat. Through these 18 years, I have tried to squeeze things in for "just me". And it was great. And needed. But they are not around anymore. All of them got too hard. Too hard to keep up with. And I think, "maybe I didn't love them passionately enough" Maybe the people that suck it up and truly are passionate are the ones who make it" Whether it was Bell Choir, or Exercise, or Volunteer work, they all eventually climbed on that pile of defeat. I'm afraid because I SO do not want this too become a casualty like the others. Like all my other attempts or crazy ideas. I want this. I want this to be really real. . . Here is some of my work. ALL of this is unedited. No photo shop. All of this is done by me.

I can do this. I will do this. I am licking the envelope now....